Monday, July 31, 2006

Is there a Walk-a-Thon or Something?

I am having a serious problem with the latest flare-up of an illness that has been stalking me my entire life. It is related to TBS (Tired Butt Syndrome) but this particular strain is known as Mush for Brains.

Symptoms include:
* Strong desire to place head on any object and shut eyes.
* Inability to complete any task without checking email/blogs/chat multiple times
* Loss of sermon mojo
* Lack of discipline to complete anything constructive even when given time to explicity do so

These symptoms can occur at any time but I seem to be especially susceptible to them during extreme weather patterns, when other people are away on vacations and I am not, or particularly on days that end in 'y'.

I have attempted to self-medicate with alternating both cold and hot coffee into the affected area and numerous diet cokes. Prescribed medication includes diet and exercise and I have seriously thought about both but I am concerned about the side effects... loose fitting clothing, severe sugar deficiency, and sweating when there is no game to be won or lost being chief among them.

Also, I am concerned about getting my sermon mojo back through a prescription because of the embarrassment that will be caused if I cannot get my laptop down after more than four hours.

With all of this in mind I am hereby:
1) Admitting I have a problem.
2) Believing in a higher power that can help me (hopefully this higher power is the same One I am currently working for)
3) Asking for help and agreeing to exer...
4) Hey, Songbird posted!
5) I should write a post.
6) It's so hot.
7) Where IS everybody..
8) Okay now where was I?
9) zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.................


NotShyChiRev said...

I'm just so glad to learn I'm not the only one suffering.

I'm doing a sermon series on Moses all this coming month and even that hasn't energized me or served as an antidote to my particular strain....LAFP....Lazy Assed Fat Pastor.

Songbird said...

Heehee, notshy!
Y'all need the beautiful four weeks in a row of vacation that I am enjoying. It's rare in this part of the world to parcel it out over the year. We are all so grateful to have the time when there is daylight and warmth, we can't imagine taking it any other time.
I hope it doesn't sound like I'm bragging or anything.
How much mojo can a person have when it's as hot as you describe?

Listing Straight said...

"Also, I am concerned about getting my sermon mojo back through a prescription because of the embarrassment that will be caused if I cannot get my laptop down after more than four hours."

Now that makes it worth coming back to work for an evening meeting. Thanks. I needed that.

Gord said...

If you find a cure...write a book! You are sure to make a million!

Just over 2 weeks till my holidays start (but hey, whose counting?)

reverendmother said...

You are too funny!

peripateticpolarbear said...

Oh my gosh, the line about the laptop...priceless.

peripateticpolarbear said...

Oh my gosh, the line about the laptop...priceless.

will smama said...

The Lord is having mercy on my soul and just 5 minutes ago we received confirmation that our beach escape is all ours the last week of September.

Beggers (and non-rent payers) cannot be choosers you know, so we have been waiting for confirmation.

Thank you Jesus! I think this ol' horse might just get moving now with that carrot dangling in front of her face.

Songbird said...

That will definitely turn nojo to mojo.

will smama said...

lol, Songbird...

Sue said...

This is just too funny! And I'm with you 100%!!

Writing sermons in July heat - feh!

My holidays (four weeks!) begin on August 21st. That seems like lightyears from now.

revabi said...

Yep a little vacation should help get the old mojo back.
You are toooo funny.
But it seems you are not the only one at this point.

will smama said...

I am not sure how I would do with four weeks in a row. Would I come back refreshed or still on vacation? What about the rest of the year when I desperately need a break?

Songbird said...

My congregation lets me take comp time after Christmas and usually a little after Easter, too. You see, they signed a contract that said "no more than 40 hours a week" and "two days off," but that rarely happens to be the case. So the week after Christmas, I don't go to the office, and we come up with something like a hymn sing for the following Sunday. The past two years I've taken 2 days off after Easter, but this year I ended up working Wednesday through Saturday, so it was really just like moving my days off. I've got to watch out for that!
Pastors with ten years+ seem to get those weeks as extra vacay time, but we only get one Cont. Ed. week. I have to say I envy you Presby revs the 2nd one of those I've heard about...

NotShyChiRev said...

I do the comp time thing too....
but 4 weeks at once? WOW...I just don't see it with me.

Here's my issue with the comp time thing...cuz I actually keep track...I've never come close to catching up...I think right now I have something like 10 days.

Still I've got 3 weeks of vacation spread over the next 3 months, so I'm not complaining too loud...

Songbird said...

You have to take into consideration that our season of good weather is very brief here. It makes the church members feel less guilty about spending their weekends "at camp," as they call it here, if the pastor is on vacation for four of the 9 or 10 Sundays they are out of pocket.

Kathryn said...

Ouch....coming in late, the condition is virulent here today. I suspect a brief burst of holiday followed by 4 working days, then more holiday may be the virus responsible..but I can't stop yawning and start sermonising, try as I might.
On the other hand, the C of E is a bit more generous with holiday allowance by the sound of it...recognising that if you live "above the shop" taking time off during the week is almost always challenging.