Tuesday, May 15, 2007

will smama: lifelong member

Why do families feel the need to lie in their relative's obituary?

I am doing a funeral tomorrow morning where I just met the surrounding family for the first time and I have never met the deceased. Yet the line in the obit states: "She was a lifetime member of Da Country Church..." actually in full it states: "She was a lifetime member of Da Country Church and the founder of the country band 'Dorothy and the Raiders,' which played from the 1970s through the 1980s."

The church was mentioned first, but the band part is actually true.

I get that this is mainly a keeping up appearances thing - someone dies and folks want to get a church affiliation in there - and it doesn't bother me. Occasionally a member of the church questions me about it but usually it is just wondering why they never heard of the person.

It just gives me a chuckle to think of people maybe envisioning God reading the obits and going "Hey Peter, set that elevator to 'up' because it says here in the paper she DID go to church - my bad."

8 comments:

Lorna (see through faith) said...

does membership require attendance?

Katherine said...

lol ;-)

PPB said...

I have also seen obits that claim BA degrees from colleges where they flunked out. Yeah, she ATTENDED here for a semester--if by attended you mean showed up for all the keggers and frat parties, but that 0.0 didn't earn her a degree---except maybe posthumously.

will smama said...

Lorna, eventually it does.

In this case we had neither - which again is not a big deal, just strikes me as funny.

Julie said...

Good one, Lorna!

Gord said...

THere are lots of longtime members of UCCan congregations taht the current clergy (or the last 3 clergy) have never met. Most of us are REALLY bad at roll maintenance--and even if it is discussed most are even more worried about taking a name off the roll.

Songbird said...

Just raise the dues; then your deacons/elders will be dying to cull the rolls.

will smama said...

Alright, the point of the post was not supposed to be about the dichotamy of membership in mainline denominations. But since we have gone there, our church vigorously trims its rolls. I have no desire to falsely inflate how big the congregation is.

The deceased joined in 1948. Sometime between now and then she was appropriately and with an attempt to bring her back into the fold, transferred to inactive.

I am still doing the funeral and I am in no way denying to the family that she was a member.

It's at 11. Gotta go.