Thursday, September 18, 2008

Mending Fences

When I arrived here at the country church that considers itself to have the ability to make friends (our motto is similar to that convoluted sentence and I don't want it to show up on a google search) it soon became apparant that the congregation was indeed friendly... IF you walked through its doors. They were not considered to be so friendly by our immediate neighbors. It seems that some of our heavy weights had pushed the neighbors around in order to get what the church needed - extra land.

The first time I became directly involved in the sins of the past was my first winter here when our snowplower pushed a pile of snow against the neighbors fence, breaking it. I noticed it when I came outside, saw the mid-twenties son of the neighbors outside and called out to him that it looked like we owed him some new fence. He agreed and he was cordial but I could tell there was an underlying tone of something... I just couldn't quite put my finger on it.

I then went inside, hit play on the answering machine and on it was a message from his mother crying into the phone that enough was enough and that the church needed to fix the fence immediately and they were tired of the way we did things around here, etc....

Now at that point I was a novice and I was naive but even I knew that it was not just about that day's snowplow incident. It turned out that a deal had been made between them and a few of the leaders of the church that in exchange for a small slice of land that would enable the church to build an entryway out to the main road, the church was supposed to give them ten pine trees. The family is a tad on the reclusive side and they wanted the church to help them block their property and home from view of the new driveway. The church never gave them the trees.

Of course, it wasn't the church it was the pastor who had retired and two of the big Mucky Mucks, both of whom have since left.

After meeting with them we had the trees delivered the very next day and gave them the wood and fencing they needed to fix their fence (they wanted to do it themselves). We even changed to someone that plows using larger equipment so that they are no longer pushing snow into the fence.

I have seen them a few times walking their dogs along the yard and we have always been friendly, but who knew what they really thought. A few weeks ago I ran into that neighbor at the store and he introduced me to the grocery clerk who he obviously knew as his "good neighbor". That was cool.

Our neighbors all around us have been similarly pushed around throughout this church's history and some of the relationships have been impossible to fix. Stuff like that takes time and they all know that I might be okay, and the leadership NOW might be okay, but who knows what to trust in the future.

That is where my own little ambassador of good will (no pun intended, but it works) comes in. You may be able to resist my charms, but you canNOT resist the dimpled charms of a 3 and a half year old asking you to race him in the parking lot.

Monday, September 15, 2008

Math Skilz

I went to Wendy's for a post-gym snack and their usual daytime cashier was there. His name is Bill and he is nice, efficient, and patient (I have been there with a screaming child). He is also mentally challenged.

Today he gave me my change and for some inexplicable reason I didn't think the change was right even after running it through my head a few more times and so in order to take the honest route I gave him a nickel back and said, "This is for you."

He looked at me funny and put it in his pocket which confused me for about five seconds until I realized that I had been wrong in the math and instead of looking honest... I had insulted the man by appearing to give him a 5 cent tip.

Her name is will smama. She is nice, efficient, and patient (I have seen her there with a screaming child).

She is also mentally challenged.

Thursday, September 4, 2008


In the denomination I currently serve there is an annual nominating process for leaders of the church. There is a rotating nominating committee that gathers to discern who the leaders in the congregation are, invites those leaders to serve and then brings those nominees to the congregation for them to formally vote.

I sit in on these meetings but tend not to say too much. I guide the discernment process but stay out of actually naming names and only on the rare occasion do I actually suggest a name be removed.

One part of my annual pep talk is to remind folks that it is not up to us to decide for people whether they have the time to do the job or not. Sure we may think we know what is going on in people's lives but they know better what is a priority in their lives and what is not. It is not up to us to keep the honor of being asked to be a leader of the congregation away from them because we think they are too busy.

So if there is a good candidate, it is up to them to discern if the health of their youngest child means they should pass on the opportunity. It is up to them to determine how much their extended family will be able to help them in their new role. It is up to them to decide if their older children could maybe use them at home more right now.

Our job is to pray for the roles that need to be filled, pray for the larger body that is to be served, and pray for the candidates for the position as they hopefully make the best choice for their family, for themselves and for those they serve.

But I don't always have to agree with the choice.